So, the time is drawing near that I'll have to pick my song and album of the year. It's coming up quickly, and I hardly have time to even think about this. I've added a new category this year: Musician of the year.

This is always very difficult to decide, because I tend to think of just the past few months. But I have to think back over an entire year.



So far the runners up are:



Song of the year-

~Sweet Lullaby - Deep Forest

~Sand in my Shoes - Dido

~Silent Running - Mike + The Mechanics

~Pancake - Tori Amos

~The Weapon - Rush

~I Can't See New York - Tori Amos

~Land of Confusion - Genesis

~Smokey Joe - Tori Amos

~Body and Soul - Tori Amos

~Dragon - Tori Amos

~Beauty of Speed - Tori Amos

~Welcome to the Machine - Pink Floyd

...possibly more to come...



Album of the year-

~We Can't Dance - Genesis

~American Doll Posse - Tori Amos

~Signals - Rush

~Scarlet's Walk - Tori Amos

...possibly more to come...



Musician of the year:

~Genesis

~Tori Amos

~Rush

It's that time again, where I am tired of the same old boring routine of everyday. I want to find a new job where I can grow, and learn in the direction of a career. I want to be able to help animals. I want to be able to be creative. I want to have free time in the morning before I go to a job. I want to get a dog.

Many things I want to change, and it's often I feel this way. I go through the process of feeling like something is wrong, then taking the time to feel and figure out what it is. Then, I have to figure out what to do to fix that aspect in my life. And that is one of the hardest things to do; firstly, figuring out what to change, secondly, putting those ideas into action. It's so hard for me to make a change. I want to know in advance that my decisions are correct. I want to see ahead of time what will happen. I am afraid of watching them unfold as I go. I fear the unexpected, and yet I miss spontaneous.

I want to be more active. Take walks more often. Go to parks, and hike. I feel I don't have anyone to do these things with on a regular basis. I'd do it on my own, but there is always that stupid warning, that women shouldn't go hiking alone, or do anything like that. There is the fear of something happening. Bah. In addition to that, I don't really like going to unknown places on my own. Anyways, I think having a dog would help with that. If I had a dog, it would give me an excuse to go on long walks, and have a companion. I could take it to parks with me, and have a hiking partner.

Brian and I went to a park near our apartment over the weekend(both days in fact) and we saw families and groups of people there bbq'ing and playing frisbee, jogging, or roller blading. I miss having my old friends to hang out with all the time. I know, I talk about this a lot. And I know the days of seeing those friends frequently are over. I've also said this before, it's time for new friends, people on the same schedule. People who I can do things with. I miss that. But I currently am not involved in anything that would give me the opportunity to meet people in my area.

We'll see what life brings....I don't know what to do. I'm still as lost as ever. @_@

Got this from

"The first ten people who reply to this journal get put up here, along with three of my favorite deviations by them.

The catch is: You have to put this in your journal as well, so no cheating.

You must have more than a dozen deviations that I can pick my three favorites from.

Please have something in your gallery (photos and drawings), or else I'll disregard the comment."

01. :[link] :[link] :[link]
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I want to have my cake and eat it too. o_O

And I want cookies too.

I don't know....

Sometimes the answers just don't come to me
I don't know the right path
I want a change
but with what?

Are decisions so easy for you to make?
Is right and wrong so clear cut?
Are thoughts so evil?

The way is not mapped out.
I must find my own way
in my own time
I just wish it wouldn't take so long
to figure it out